Category: Accountability

Let nothing hinder your prayers

9/15/2014

Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

Peter is very clear here.

As husbands we are to:

1. Be considerate as we live with our wife - Do you put up roadblocks to her happiness and to her success? Being considerate is thinking about how to make her life better and easier. Being considerate is acting upon those thoughts. Consideration is asking, "can I do something for you?" and "is there something you need done?" Consideration is trying to anticipate her needs and doing them before she asks.

2. Treat our wife with respect - Being respectful is treating her like she is the most important person in the world. Having the niceties that a gentleman displays: Saying please, thank you, excuse me, etc. To respect her is to honor her. Do you dishonor her with your actions? Do you take her for granted? Do you tell your children how wonderful she is and that they need to respect her like you do? Are you brave enough to challenge your children to treat her like you do?

3. Remember that she is an heir of the gracious gift of life - Most importantly, she is a child of God. The Maker of the Universe, the Creator, has made her uniquely to serve His purposes. Do you treat her like a Christian sister? Do you encourage her spiritual growth? Do you encourage her to spend time with other godly women? Do you offer to take care of your children so that she can have some alone time with God?

"Christian husbands and wives share a common experience of grace and a common destiny of salvation. A husband must honor his wife since she, as much as he, has access to God's grace in Christ. In addition, since husbands and wives are partners together in grace, a husband's relationship with God will be affected for good or ill by his relationship with his wife. When husbands treat their wives with consideration and honor, they are true to the nature of grace. They are acting as God's people, and thus their relationship with God may be deepened through prayer."

Peter is very clear here:

If you don't honor your wife, your prayers will be hindered

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

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Hating sin

9/11/2014

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Within the heart of every disciple of Jesus should be an intense hatred for sin. We despise not just the sins that we sin in the world but we detest even more so the sin that we sin in us. We hate the sin of pride, the sin of hypocrisy that we sin in us. We long to be like Jesus in all that we say and do (1 John 2:6) but we see that we are often far from that perfect standard (Matthew 5:48).

And I believe this is a great assurance that we are truly saved. This hatred for sin. There is no denying that the Bible forbids us from dwelling in sin (1 John 3:4-10). Paul the Apostle teaches us in Romans 6 that having been baptized into Christ Jesus, we are now free from sin and its power. We are free to be slaves of righteousness.

However, I still see sin in my life. I don't mean that I wake up and commit sin. I hate sin. But I still find the Holy Spirit placing His gentle hand upon me and revealing to me my own arrogance, my own pride, my own self-righteousness and my sins of the tongue (James 3:1-12). There are seasons it seems where the Spirit will give me that assurance that I am focused on Christ and He truly is my reward but then there are times where the Holy Spirit reveals to me my sins. I have learned to love those times. I have learned that the Holy Spirit is doing this out of love for me and not out of condemnation (Romans 8:1). I remember that Hebrews 12:5-6 and I keep coming back to that text as the Spirit opens my wicked heart up to show me what I need to repent of.

Repentance is an ongoing process. I have been a disciple of Jesus for over 20 years and I find that He is still working on me. The Spirit of God is still in the process of making me more like Christ. I don't doubt that I am much different from when I first repented. I have come a long ways. Yet I still have far to go. I might not struggle with what I struggled with as a 17-year-old when I was baptized into Christ but I am still far from what I want to be.

We live in a sinful fallen world. We live in a world with sin all around us. Satan uses these tools to attract the world to its destruction. For the disciple of Christ, we hate this world (1 John 2:15-17). We long to be clothed in perfect righteousness where we will not struggle with sin. We long to forever with our Lord and away from this sinful world. Yet we remain here and we have to fight against sin. We do this not by our own will power but in the power of the Spirit (Galatians 5:16-17) and through the hope that we have in the gospel. Our salvation is based on the work of Jesus Christ and what He has done (John 19:30; Ephesians 1:7). Our salvation is based not on our works but upon the saving work of the Lord Jesus Christ (Ephesians 2:8-9). This does not take away our personal responsibility before God but empowers us toward holiness (Titus 2:12). Holiness flows from grace (Ephesians 2:10).

I pray that all disciples of Jesus will hate sin. I pray that we all would long to be like Christ in all that we are (Ephesians 5:1-2). God calls us to holiness (1 Peter 1:15-16) and this is accomplished one step at a time. Along the way, I trust the Lord to be faithful to His promises and sanctify me (1 Thessalonians 5:23-24).

This post was written by my friend, The Seeking Disciple. For the original post, go to: http://arminiantoday.wordpress.com/2014/09/07/hating-sin/

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Matt Hasselbeck: A man of character & faith

9/9/2014

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“God’s plans were better than my plans,” Hasselbeck said.

He elaborated on that by saying that he envisioned a different path to the NFL, perhaps one that included an invite to the scouting combine, being drafted earlier than the sixth round or spending his entire rookie season on the practice squad.

Hasselbeck quickly added that he was grateful for the experiences that led him to this point in his career and the relationships he’s built along the way.

Hasselbeck said he’s been able to see God’s work when he reflects from his time as a backup in Green Bay, to when he became the starter in Seattle and when he joined Tennessee in 2011 after 10 seasons with the Seahawks.

These are excerpts from Hasselbeck's FCA testimony, found here: http://www.titansonline.com/community/article-1/Hasselbeck-Shares-Testimony-at-FCA-Banquet/2f4952f7-0012-43ee-bd5b-208bdc9536c7

Here is a video of Hasselbeck sharing his testimony:

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Do you want sin with that?

9/6/2014

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Sometimes there is nothing more convenient that taking a little detour through your local fast food establishment, and picking up a greasy burger. No matter how much of a health nut you are, anyone can admit that the ease of picking up a cheap meat-fix is unrivaled by any other nourishment. Doctors will tell us that these meals are not a part of a recommended diet…and sometimes, when these health professionals tell us this all we hear is Charlie Brown’s teacher. In fact I think there have been times when my doctor has explained the dangers of this type of diet and all I could think about was who currently has a promo for a sandwich with a pretzel bun.

Since my family has been eating healthier, this type of eating is more rare, but it still creeps into our regimen from time to time. It really isn’t detrimental if it is extremely rare, and every one knows that moderation is key in this context. No matter how often I tell myself this though, it seems like I fall into old habits and it is just so easy to eat this way regularly. No matter how many times someone tells me that this lifestyle is okay in moderation, the temptation sucks me in. I have realized that I have to be extra careful. The truth is there have been times when I have been addicted to this food. It starts with one meal, then someone else will pay the next day, and then we get home late the next day and that time is supposed to be our last. We then reflect on our month, and it is riddled with cheap meals with little nutritional value. When we are in the moment, there are so many excuses…they seem to make so much sense.

Something else interesting happens… I have found that, when I eat this way, I become more lethargic about my health. It becomes a lower priority, and relaxing moves higher on the list.

When we are involved in sin, we see similar symptoms. Each action seems okay in moderation, but after a while we begin to make excuses for why we are entitled to feel the way we do. We become lethargic about our own transformation because it is too hard. You see, sin is a form of spiritual nourishment…At the time it seems so satisfying and a craving is extinguished for a temporary time, but the more we allow ourselves to be overcome by it, we realize the power it has over us. Our anger, unforgiveness, addictions, or pride seems justified at the time and the easiest thing in the world is to give into it. THEN, as we become more comfortable with this lifestyle of giving into temptation, we become less comfortable with healthy behaviors (i.e. church, fellowship, giving, prayer, etc). If we allow it to win, we then find ourselves feeding bitterness until we transform into a being we were never intended to be.

Stop making excuses and choose health over sin. God loves you too much to allow you to be hypnotized into death.

This post was written by Rev DeCrastos. For the original post, go to: http://other-words.net/2014/09/01/do-you-want-sin-with-that/

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Trippin' down memory lane

9/3/2014

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I was talking to a gentleman at a bar and he made an interesting comment. "You know Sam that goes to your church? You should talk to him. He used to be one of the meanest men I've ever met." He proceeded to tell about some of Sam's antics. Some of Sam's antics were funny, some were off-color, and some were downright mean. I knew Sam came to our church but I didn't know him very well.

So, next Sunday, I found Sam after church and stopped him for a moment. I told him that I met a man earlier in the week who told me about him. I started to tell him a bit of what I heard and he interrupted me. What Sam said next startled me. He said, "Dale, I'm a Christian now. I am so ashamed of what I used to be. I was not a nice man. I cannot talk about it." Sam said this in such a manner that it was obvious that I had really hurt him. I quickly apologized to him and he excused himself.

Sam taught me an important lesson that day.

Do I take sin seriously?
Do I take my sin seriously?

On another occasion, I was having lunch with a friend who was a new Christian. In the midst of our conversation, he made this interesting comment, "As I grow in my faith, I learn how my past behavior, though forgiven, was shameful and wrong."

That's one of many reasons why I love hanging out with new Christians. They don't have all those defenses that "mature" Christians have.

My new friend taught me an important lesson that day.

Have I taken my sin seriously?
Am I truly repentant of what I have done in the past?

I'm not saying that I need to wallow in my past sinful behavior.
I'm not saying that I need to live a life full of guilt.

I just wonder if I take too many trips down memory lane, thinking about how much "fun" I used to have?

Do I feel godly sorrow for my past?
Do I feel regret for my past behavior?

These men taught me that a real man faces his past and takes responsibility for his behavior. A real man is sensitive to God's work in his life. A real man doesn't recall past sinful behavior in a positive manner. A real man is a new creation. He adamantly rejects sin.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

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4 ways to foster health in your worship team

9/1/2014

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I’ve been involved in leading worship in the church in some fashion for almost sixteen years. I have run sound, lights, and media for church services. I have played in bands, chamber groups and orchestras. I have sung in choirs big and small, on praise teams talent-filled and talentless. I have been a part of traditional, contemporary and modern worship services and as many blends of such things as exist. And I’ve seen all kinds of leadership for these teams, including my own leadership, which has definitely had its highs and lows.

I say all of this because one truth about worship teams emerges when I look back at all this experience: I’d rather be a part of a healthy worship team than a talented worship team. Actually, the best worship teams I’ve ever been a part of were good precisely because they were healthy. They were made up of people who looked to live in spiritual health, and they adopted practices that encouraged personal and “professional” health for the sake of the task of leading the church in worship. Here are four ways you can begin to foster health on your worship team.

1) Communicate the Vision of Why You Gather Each Week There is perhaps no better way to get your team focused than to help them understand why the church gathers for worship each week. If you ask them, you’ll probably hear all kinds of answers, and each one of those answers informs not only their view of the worship gathering, but their role in facilitating it. Spend time with your church’s leadership in cultivating a clear understanding as to why your church gather’s for worship each week, then communicate that to your team. This will help your team members understand how their roles and actions fit (or perhaps do not fit!) into the vision of what worship is in the life of your church.

2) Be Clear About Your Expectations If you are leading the team, you probably have certain expectations about how the people on your team should prepare for and perform the tasks they have volunteered to do. You should do your best to communicate these expectations clearly to your team members. They should know what you expect on the front end so they can agree to strive towards these expectations or choose not to take on the task. You should also take some time to hear what they expect from you as a leader. This up-front communication provides great accountability and can prevent hurt and disappointment over unmet expectations on all sides.

3) Teach Your Team How To Prepare, Not Just Perform With #1 and #2 in mind, your team members should understand the task at hand for them both as individuals and as a team. But understanding the task is not enough; one must also know how to prepare in order to accomplish the task. Help your team understand that preparation is a part of stewardship, and equip them as you can with the skills they need to prepare well. Doing so may mean more work on your part, but that is . Giving them access to equipment, planning sets and charts early, and even one-on-one training may be a part of helping your team prepare to lead. Just remember: investing in these things early will pay huge dividends in the long run.

4) Remember That People Come First The people on our teams are not a means to an end. They are participants in the life and mission of God with you. Treat them as such. Take time to love and pastor the people on your team. Pray with them. Speak truth to them in love. Make room for them to be as messy as you are, and be gracious when their mess spills over into team life. Build in times of rest from the jobs (like a service sabbath) and help them prioritize when needed, knowing that both too much and too little time given to the team could be a problem. Remember that your time together with your team is not just to make good music, but is purposed for your collective sanctification. Invest in who they are, not just what they can do for you. And remind them that all that you do together is not just for their sake, but is for the sake of the world and to the glory of God.

This post was written by Seedbed author, Drew Causey. For the original post, go to: http://seedbed.com/feed/4-ways-foster-health-worship-team/

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Forever: Building a lasting marriage

8/13/2014

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Apart from my parents, no one in my life has demonstrated to me the best of what love and marriage can be more than our friends, Mike and Nancy. In a hundred ways, they’ve given Jennifer and me something to reach for. So I took it seriously when Mike sat me down one night and said,

“Chance, you’re changing and you’re about to screw up the best thing that’s ever happened to you.”

Jennifer and I were dating. I had my eyes on a ring and was dreaming of how I might ask her to marry me. But I also happened to have several friends at the time who were not only divorcing—they were ripping each other to shreds in the process. These were people I knew well and loved deeply. I’d even stood in a couple of their weddings. I thought their marriages would last forever; we all did. But now they were making an enemy of the one they promised to love most.

It was hard to watch, and it took a big toll on me.

As a result, I began pulling away from Jennifer – guarding my heart, putting up a barrier between us, trying to protect myself and living out of a fear born of someone else’s mistakes. Mike knew me well enough he could tell what was going on. One day, he grabbed me by the shoe that was propped over one of my legs as he passed my chair, smiled and said,

“Those are some cold feet you’ve got there. What’s going on with you? Tell me what you’re afraid of.”

I knew I was about to get some answers, so I was honest with him. I unloaded all of my doubts and at the end, I asked him, “How can I be sure we’ll last forever?”

His response surprised me. He said, “You can’t. You can only be sure it’s going to last forever... a day at a time. You make it to forever, bit by bit.”

I’ll admit. It was a good answer—but not good enough. “Okay, but how can I trust that who she is today is who she’ll be down the road? How do I know she won’t destroy my heart someday…or that I won’t destroy hers?”

“That’s the wrong question, Chance. That question will keep you from ever fully trusting or committing, in or out of marriage. You should be asking, can I trust her heart today? Can she trust mine today? Then, do what it takes to be able to answer yes. You ask today, and again tomorrow and the day after that… That’s how you get to forever.”

All of that seemed good and true, but it still wasn’t enough for me. I desperately wanted
some sort of guarantee I couldn’t get. The next words out of Mike’s mouth have become a compass for me. They’re simple, so don’t miss the gift they carry. He said,

“Chance, you want a guarantee? I’ll guarantee you this. 100% of the time that marriages get in trouble, it starts with people saying to themselves: ‘My needs aren’t being met. She’s overlooking me. He’s not doing enough. I deserve better.’ Once you start looking at things in terms of what you are or aren’t getting, you’re on a dangerous road.”

Even considering the words as I write them makes my heart beat a little faster. Something in me wants to argue the point, and something else tells me it’s true.

“You wanna know why Nancy and I have something few people have?” he asked. “Here’s our secret. Every day I wake up and I ask myself, ‘How can I serve her today? What does she need? What can I do to make her life better?’ Something always comes to mind, and I do it.”

“That can’t be true, Mike” I argued. “You don’t actually do that every day, do you? Wouldn’t that just make you a servant or a door mat?”

“I absolutely do. And you’re right, it could make me a doormat…if I were the only one asking the question. But the thing is, she does the same thing. She wakes up and asks herself, ‘How can I serve him today? What does he need? What can I do to make his life better?’ Something comes to mind and she does it.”

“Everyday?”

“Every single day, for more than 30 amazing years with the love of my life. Both of us are adored and our needs are being met, but neither of us is focused on getting what we want or deserve. There’s no need to fight for it if someone else is fighting the battle for you. And neither of us keeps a list of all the ways the other has dropped the ball. As long as you’re focused on what you’re owed, you’re not focused enough on what you’re there to give.”

It took me a few days to get beyond the surface of his words, but as I did, my trust in Jennifer grew. My trust in myself grew. And maybe for the first time, I began to understand the difference between a good marriage and a great one. I wish I could say that I get this right all the time. The truth is I still consider it a good day when I put Jennifer’s needs ahead of my own. I privately pat myself on the back for being so thoughtful. I have so far to go. But I won’t stop working on it.

She’s worth it. We’re worth it.

Married, single, among friends or with our families, what if we let each other off the hook and started fresh—this time considering each other as more important than ourselves?

What if each of us woke up tomorrow asking what we could do for those we love the most? What if we fought to see each others’ needs met instead of our own?

What would life look like if we abandoned the thought that we are owed something or deserve something better?

What if we made it our mission to make something better of the beautiful thing we have?

Those are some of the questions that create our happily ever after. Those are the questions that get us to forever… one day at a time.

This post was written by Chance Scoggins. You can find it in the free e-book, 25 Marriage Hacks. For the free e-book, go to: http://books.noisetrade.com/tylerward/marriage-hacks

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Predicting temptation

7/31/2014

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There is an important principle in handling temptation. Did you know that many times, you can anticipate temptation?

Look at the picture of this mountain path and I will try and describe this principle to you. Imagine yourself at the bottom of this mountain and you want to reach the top. The path circles around the mountain, rather circuitously and over time, you get to where you know this mountain fairly well. You know that when you get to the east side of the mountain, the drop is shear and the side is craggy and the path is treacherous. Fortunately, for you, the path has rails (like in the picture) that help you stay steady. On the north face of the mountain, the wind is very brisk, you almost feel like you will be blown off the path. On the west side, the path is lush and covered with trees that shield you from the rain and sun. On the south side, it is stark and barren and the sun or the rain beats down upon you miserably.

You know pretty much what's coming ahead because you have been there before. So you continue on your journey in anticipation. You know that you need support when you come to the slippery east side. You know that you need to grab trees and use your walking cane on the windy north side. You know that you can take it easy and enjoy yourself on the west side. You know that you need to apply protection to prevent sunburn on the south side.

Usually, as you traverse up a mountain, it takes less time to go around it because it is usually smaller the further up you go. Just like temptation, the more you prepare for it and the more times you say no to temptation, the easier the path.

Do you have the picture? Do you get what I am saying?

Think of this path as your life. You can pretty much predict what will happen if you go certain places. If you have to go someplace treacherous, get some support. Take someone with you, be accountable when you go there. If you find yourself in a place that can blow you off your feet, look for trees and walking canes that you can grab onto. If you are in the heat and need to apply SONSCREEN, ask God for His protection.

This is the principle to handling temptation: Anticipate, think, plan, pray. Use your brain. Trust the Holy Spirit's guidance.

You can't use the excuse, "I just couldn't help myself, after all I'm only human." God gave you a brain, you're not stupid. You're not an animal that just reacts. You can think and plan ahead...

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

My thanks to Tom Eisenman for this concept.

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Walking down that street

7/29/2014

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We were visiting Amsterdam, exploring shops and the canals. At one shop on the canal there were the most beautiful flowers you have ever seen. It was a wonderful day. Everything was perfect. We were walking hand-in-hand enjoying Amsterdam. Kinda like two kids at a zoo. Excitement. Fun. Happiness.

The next thing I know, Karyn says, "don't look right." So, I put my right hand up to block my view. Then she said, "don't look left." So, I put up my left hand to block my view. So, now, I am walking down this street on this beautiful day looking like a horse with blinders. I said, "what's going on?" Karyn said, "we've stumbled into the Red Light District." I dropped my hands and looked around and yep, she was right. There were some windows with scantily clad women beckoning us to come in. We promptly turned around and left that street.

You ask, "how in the world didn't you know that you were entering the most famous Red Light District in the world?" Well, it was still bright out, even though we didn't realize the sun was starting to descend. If it had been dark, we would have seen the red lights warning us that we had wandered into "adult" territory.

So, what does this story tell us about temptation?

Well, I was certainly glad that I had my wife with me. She saw things up ahead that I hadn't noticed. She loves me and wants to protect our marriage. So, if you are doing something new, something you have never done before, it would be good to not be alone. Because you never know what is on that street.

The person you take with you needs to be committed to holiness and purity. S/he needs to be able to stop you when you start to go somewhere you shouldn't be going. Because you never know what is on that street.

Temptation sneaks up on you when you least suspect. We were having a great time. Exploring Amsterdam, enjoying the sunshine and building memories. Then, boom! There it is. Right in front of you. Sometimes, we are lulled into complacency or feeling really good and then we are blindsided. Temptation can come from anywhere. You know why?

Because you never know what is on that street.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

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Don't walk down that street

7/28/2014

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The Beaver was just sent money from his rich uncle for his birthday. Beaver signed for it at the post office and his parents didn't know that he had the money.

His friend, Gilbert, went to the post office with him. On the way to the post office, Beaver was telling Gilbert about this race car that he had been admiring in the toy store window for the last month. However, Beaver's dad said that Beaver had plenty of race cars and he needed to "get that idea" out of his head of ever owning it. After picking up the birthday money from the post office, they both noticed that Beaver's uncle sent him a $10 bill. The car cost $9.13 I think you know where this story is going...

Gilbert: Hey, let's walk down this street on the way home (Beaver complies)
Beaver: Gilbert why did we choose this street?
Gilbert: We always walk down this street Beaver.
Beaver: (standing in front of the toy store) I don't think we should've walked down this street.
Gilbert: It doesn't hurt to look, let's go inside.
Beaver: OK but I'm not buying, I need to talk to my dad first.
Beaver: (walking out of the store) I don't know how it happened, I wasn't going to buy it. I DON'T THINK WE SHOULD HAVE WALKED DOWN THIS STREET.

The story continues where Beaver has to tell one lie to cover up another and before you know it, being totally honest is a very difficult thing for him. Wally knows the truth and he even lies for Beaver.

What can the Beaver teach us about how to be a real man?
1) Sometimes, our "friends" don't have our best interests at heart.
2) If you have to lie/deceive, then you are getting yourself into trouble.
3) If you have to lie/deceive to cover up your lies/deception, you're getting yourself into deeper trouble.
4) If your lying/deceiving causes someone else to lie/deceive others, you're getting into even deeper trouble.
5) Many temptations can be avoided: IF YOU KNOW YOU HAVE A WEAKNESS, DON'T PUT YOURSELF IN A SITUATION WHERE YOU KNOW YOU WILL BE TEMPTED
6) It is never to late to do the right thing. No matter how profound your deception, your life will be better if you come clean.
7) Even when you finally do the right thing, you will have consequences from your past, but your past will no longer have control over you.
8) When you finally do the right thing, you will find out who your real friends are and you will also find support from those who really care.

So, when you hear the Holy Spirit telling you, "maybe we shouldn't walk down this street" it would be good to listen.

Don't walk down that street.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

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Let nothing hinder your prayers

Hating sin

Matt Hasselbeck: A man of character & faith

Do you want sin with that?

Trippin' down memory lane

4 ways to foster health in your worship team

Forever: Building a lasting marriage

Predicting temptation

Walking down that street

Don't walk down that street

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