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Porn addiction escalates

1/30/2015

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Because of its addictive nature, in order to just feel some sense of normality, an individual usually needs an ever increasing dosage of porn. The material that they seek out also evolves. Overtime their appetite pushed them to more hardcore versions to achieve the same level of arousal.Have you ever wondered how pornographers that charge for their material stay in business when there’s so much porn available for free? 


As Wendy Seltzer—an attorney and fellow at Yale Law School—explained, the answer is actually pretty simple: once porn users get hooked, they’ll want more and more. “Seeing [free porn] just whets their appetite for more,” Seltzer said. “Once they get through what’s available for free, they’ll move into the paid services.”

Fortunately for pornographers, that pattern isn’t likely to change any time soon since the reason it happens is built into the brain.

Pornography researchers have found that users acclimate to the porn they watch—they get used to it, and it stops being exciting or arousing. Why? Because their brain’s pleasure response has gotten numb. 

When a person is aroused by porn, their brain releases a chemical called dopamine that makes them feel pleasure.  As the dopamine goes through their brain, it leaves behind a pathway created by a protein called iFosB (pronounced delta fos b)  that connects feeling aroused to looking at porn.  Basically dopamine is saying “this feels good; let’s remember how to get back here,” and iFosB goes to work building a brain pathway to make it easier for the person to do that again. When this happens with healthy behaviors it is a good thing, but when it happens with unhealthy ones it can lead to trouble.

The problem is, when a person consistently looks at porn, their brain is constantly being flooded with a high level of dopamine. A healthy brain isn’t used to that, so the brain responds by getting rid of some of its dopamine receptors, which take in the dopamine that’s released so that the brain knows it’s there.  With fewer receptors, the user can’t feel the dopamine’s effects as much—and suddenly the porn that used to excite starts seeming boring.

Many leading brain researchers now believe that once a porn user’s brain starts cutting back on dopamine receptors, to get the same excitement and arousal they used to feel, many porn users need an even larger surge of dopamine; to get it, they have to look at more porn, look at porn more often, or look at more hardcore material.  You see, it’s not just arousal that gets dopamine pumping. The brain also releases it when it sees something novel, shocking, or surprising.  That’s why consistent porn users often find themselves looking for harder and harder images.  On top of that, because they’ve built up such a high tolerance to arousing material, to feel excited many users have to combine sexual arousal with the feeling of aggressive release.  That’s why so much of hardcore porn is full of images of women being physically harmed.  It’s also the reason that many porn addicts quickly find themselves looking at things that used to disgust them or that they used to see as morally wrong. 

On top of needing harder material, many porn addicts find themselves craving porn more and more often.  That’s because while they’re overloading their brain with dopamine, they’re also building up higher levels of iFosB. The more iFosB, the more the user’s brain drives them to look at porn, even if they don’t like the material they’re looking at. 

As the addiction deepens, users not only become more impulsive, making it more likely that they’ll give into their cravings, but also whenever they encounter a stressful situation, they’re more likely to feel like they don’t have any way to deal with the stress other than by turning to porn’s temporary distraction. 

And the more they turn back to their habit, the deeper the brain pathways that lead back to using become, making it harder and harder to break the cycle.

This post is taken from the website, http://www.fightthenewdrug.org

Citations to support the statements in this post are available upon request.  





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Porn is addictive

1/28/2015

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"Pornographers promise healthy pleasure and relief from sexual tension, but what they often deliver is an addiction, tolerance, and an eventual decrease in pleasure."  - Norman Doidge, MD, The Brain That Changes Itself 

It wasn’t very long ago that doctors and researchers believed that in order for something to be addictive, it had to involve an outside substance that you physically put into your body, like cigarettes, alcohol, or drugs. 

Once we got a peek into the brain, however, our understanding of how addictions work changed.  It turns out, cigarettes, alcohol, and drugs have more in common than you might think. Sure, on the outside, some are poured into a glass while others are lit on fire and smoked. But once they’re in the body, they all do the same thing to the brain: flood it with a chemical called dopamine. That’s what makes them addictive. And porn does the exact same thing. 

You see, your brain comes equipped with something called a “reward pathway.”  Its job is to motivate you to do things that keep you and your genes alive—things like eating or having sex to produce babies.  The way it rewards you is by releasing dopamine into your brain, because dopamine makes you feel good. 

However, just because your brain has adapted to motivate you to do something doesn’t mean it’s always good for you. For example, your brain produces higher levels of dopamine when you have chocolate cake than it does for whole-wheat bread.  Why? Because 3,000 years ago, high-calorie foods were really hard to come by, so when our ancestors found them, it was important that they eat a whole bunch while the getting was good.  These days, a bag of Oreos is only as far as the nearest supermarket. If we gorged on them every chance we got, chances are we’d get heart disease, gain weight, and develop a bunch of other health problems.

Porn is basically sexual junk food. When a person is looking at porn, their brain thinks they’re seeing a potential mating opportunity, and pumps the brain full of dopamine.  And unlike healthy sexual relationships that build up over time with an actual person, porn offers an endless stream of hyper-sexual images that flood the brain with high levels of dopamine every time the user clicks to a new image. 

Setting your brain up for an overload of feel-good chemicals might sound like a good idea at first, but just like with junk food, what feels like a good thing, in this case isn’t at all. Because porn use floods the brain with high chemical levels, the brain starts to fight back. Over time, the brain will actually cut down on its dopamine receptors—the tiny landing docs that take the dopamine in once it’s been released in your brain.  As a result, porn that once excited a person often stops having the same effect, and the user has to look at more porn, look at porn more often, or find a more hardcore version—or all three—to get aroused. 

Eventually, as the brain acclimates to the overload of dopamine, users often find that they can’t feel normal without that dopamine high.  Little things that used to make them happy, like seeing a friend or playing their favorite sport, can’t compete with the dopamine flood that comes with porn, so they’re left feeling anxious or down until they can get back to it. 

On top of that, dopamine doesn’t travel alone. When the brain is getting a hit of dopamine, it’s also getting new pathways built into it with a protein called “iFosB” (pronounced delta fos b). 

Essentially, iFosB’s job is to help you remember to do things that feel good or are important.  While dopamine is motivating your brain to do things and rewarding it for doing them, iFosB is quietly leaving trail markers in your brain, creating a pathway to help you get back there.  When this happens with healthy behaviors, it’s a very good thing. However, as little as one dose of many drugs will also cause iFosB to start building up in the brain’s neurons, and of course porn’s powerful dopamine surge causes iFosB to build up as well. 

The more a user looks at porn, the more iFosB accumulates,  essentially beating down the brain pathways leading to using, making it easier and easier for the user to turn back to that behavior, whether they want to or not. Eventually, if enough iFosB accumulates, it can “flip a genetic switch,” causing irreversible changes in the brain that leave the user more susceptible to addiction. 

And for teens, the risks are especially high, since a teen brain’s reward pathway has a response two to four times more powerful than an adult brain—which means teen brains release even higher levels of dopamine. Teen brains also produce higher levels of iFosB, leaving them extra vulnerable to addiction. 

This post is taken from the website, http://www.fightthenewdrug.org

Citations to support the statements in this post are available upon request.  





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Porn is like a drug

1/26/2015

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On the surface, cocaine and porn don’t seem to have a lot in common. One is purchased in seedy alleyways; the other is free to download. One habit can get expensive pretty fast, while the other is about the price of a high-speed Internet connection. Besides, Hugh Heffner doesn’t exactly conjure up images of a cartel drug lord. 

So where’s the similarity? Inside the brain. 

In case you’re not a neurosurgeon, here’s a crash course in how the brain works. Deep inside your brain, there’s something called a “reward pathway.” You’ve got one. Your cat’s got one. For mammals, it comes standard. The reward pathway’s job is to help keep you alive by doing exactly what its name promises: rewards you, or more specifically, rewards you when you do something that promotes life, such as eating food or achieving something you’ve worked hard for. And the way it rewards you is by releasing chemicals in your brain— mainly one called dopamine, but also others like oxytocin. 

Normally, these chemicals are really handy. They help us feel pleasure and to bond with other people, and they motivate us to come back to important activities that make us happy. The problem is, the reward pathway can be hijacked. 

The way substances like cocaine and opioids make users feel high is by triggering the reward pathway to release unnaturally high levels of dopamine without making the user do any of the work to earn it. Want to guess what else does that? Porn. 

And that surge of dopamine is causing more than just feelings. As it goes pulsing through the brain, dopamine helps to create new brain pathways that essentially lead the user back to the behavior that triggered the chemical release. 

The more a drug user hits up or a porn user looks at porn, the more those pathways get wired into the brain, making it easier and easier for the person to turn back to using, whether they want to or not. 

Over time, the constant overload of chemicals causes other brain changes as well. Just like a junkie will eventually require more and more of a drug to get a buzz or even just feel normal, porn users can quickly build up a tolerance as their brains adapt to the high levels of dopamine that porn releases. In other words, even though porn is still releasing dopamine into the brain, the user can’t feel its effects as much. 

That’s because the brain is trying to protect itself from the overload of dopamine by getting rid of some of its chemical receptors, which act like tiny catcher’s mitts that receive the dopamine released. With fewer receptors, the brain thinks less dopamine is there and the user doesn’t feel as strong a reaction. As a result, they have to find more porn, find it more often, or find a more extreme version—or all three— to generate even more dopamine to feel excited. 

And once a porn user becomes accustomed to a brain pulsing with these chemicals, trying to cut back on the habit can lead to withdrawal symptoms, just like with drugs. While people often think of porn as something that’s been around forever, today’s version of porn is a whole new ball game. Thanks to the Internet, porn now mixes the most powerful natural dopamine release the body can produce with a cocktail of other elements—endless novelty, shock, and surprise—all of which increase the dopamine surge. And because Internet porn offers an endless stream of variety, users can flip to a new image every time their high starts to fade, keeping dopamine levels elevated for hours. 

Describing porn’s effect to a U.S. Senate committee, Dr. Jeffrey Satinover of Princeton University said, “It is as though we have devised a form of heroin 100 times more powerful than before, usable in the privacy of one’s own home and injected directly to the brain through the eyes.” 


This post is taken from the website, http://www.fightthenewdrug.org

Citations to support the statements in this blog are available upon request.  


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To my porn watching dad, from your daughter

12/18/2014

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Dear Dad,

I want to let you know first of all that I love you and forgive you for what this has done in my life. I also wanted to let you know exactly what your porn use has done to my life. You may think that this effects only you, or even your and mom’s relationships. But it has had a profound impact on me and all of my siblings as well.

I found your porn on the computer somewhere around the age of 12 or so, just when I was starting to become a young woman. First of all, it seemed very hypocritical to me that you were trying to teach me the value of what to let into my mind in terms of movies, yet here you were entertaining your mind with this junk on a regular basis. Your talks to me about being careful with what I watched meant virtually nothing.

Because of pornography, I was aware that mom was not the only woman you were looking at. I became acutely aware of your wandering eye when we were out and about. This taught me that all men have a wandering eye and can’t be trusted. I learned to distrust and even dislike men for the way they perceived women in this way.

As far as modesty goes, you tried to talk with me about how my dress affects those around me and how I should value myself for what I am on the inside. Your actions however told me that I would only ever truly be beautiful and accepted if I looked like the women on magazine covers or in porn. Your talks with me meant nothing and in fact, just made me angry.

As I grew older, I only had this message reinforced by the culture we live in. That beauty is something that can only be achieved if you look like “them”. I also learned to trust you less and less as what you told me didn’t line up with what you did. I wondered more and more if I would ever find a man who would accept me and love me for me and not just a pretty face.

When I had friends over, I wondered how you perceived them. Did you see them as my friends, or did you see them as a pretty face in one of your fantasies? No girl should ever have to wonder that about the man who is supposed to be protecting her and other women in her life.

I did meet a man. One of the first things I asked him about was his struggle with pornography. I’m thankful to God that it is something that hasn’t had a grip on his life. We still have had struggles because of the deep-rooted distrust in my heart for men. Yes, your porn watching has affected my relationship with my husband years later.

If I could tell you one thing, it would be this: Porn didn’t just affect your life; it affected everyone around you in ways I don’t think you can ever realize. It still affects me to this day as I realize the hold that it has on our society. I dread the day when I have to talk with my sweet little boy about pornography and its far-reaching greedy hands. When I tell him about how pornography, like most sins, affects far more than just us.

Like, I said, I have forgiven you. I am so thankful for the work that God has done in my life in this area. It is an area that I still struggle with from time to time, but I am thankful for God’s grace and also my husband’s. I do pray that you are past this and that the many men who struggle with this will have their eyes opened.

Love, Your Daughter

This post is anonymous.  The original can be found here:  http://www.faithit.com/an-open-letter-to-the-dad-looking-at-porn/



BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.




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Conquering sexual sin

10/4/2014

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Sexual sin once robbed your heart of something very precious.  Every little boy sees the fight for right and desires to be an agent of good, to be the good guy who saves the day.

Every little boy has dreams and visions of one day being someone great and doing something great, but sexual sin often steals these dreams away.  God wants to recapture those dreams and restore them for God's man on the battlefield.  Victory restores these hopes and renews the dreams that were once vaporized in the midst of sexual sin.

The dream lives!  Now, with a sanctified heart, you know what you can do in Him.  You feel it.  You're a fighting machine, confident as you approach any battle.  You've proven that your Command Officer can trust you with much as long as you abide in Him.  And He's proven that you can trust Him to supply all you need in battle.

Battles test and transform soldiers, and this test revealed the depth of your love for Him.  You're stronger, and you're changed.  God is a strong God, and He wants strong, confident soldiers in His kingdom who are good in a fight, even when facing daunting odds that seem overwhelming.

Taken from Every Man's Challenge, pp 33-34.


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Practical purity

10/3/2014

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I desire to be sexually pure. I want to be faithful to God, to my wife, to my family,  to my church, and to folks who read the blog. Here are some disciplines that I have found to help me to flee sexual temptation. These are not hard fast rules, each man is different, but this is what works for me:

Stay Close to God
I ask God to help me. I ask him to renew my mind. I ask him to keep the enemy away. I ask him to purify my sub conscience. I ask him to show me lies that I have believed, that have warped my sexuality. I ask him to heal me. He is faithful.  Staying close to God mean listening to His voice.  He knows when I’m tempted, and desires to protect me.  Staying close to God requires setting aside my rights.  If I sense a prompting from the Spirit to do something (like turn off the computer), I need to do it.  Staying close to God also means staying close to others who care – particularly my wife.

Be Accountable to my Wife
Almost every day my wife asks me this question, “Have you been good?”  Implicit in her question is whether or not I have looked at pornography or have entertained lustful thoughts. I can’t lie to my wife, and she can sense if I’m not fully honest.  So she keeps me accountable. I’m  thankful that I have a strong and confident wife who has the courage and strength to ask me these sorts of questions.  Word to the men out there: you can’t go alone.  You need someone else to keep you accountable.   If this issue is too hurtful for your wife (or if you’re single), you need some like-minded Christian men to keep you accountable.

Go to Bed on Time
This is kind of a no brainer, but it works. I’m most likely to be tempted when everyone else has gone to bed and when I’m tired.  If I go to bed on time, I avoid the temptation.  If I do happen to stay up late, my wife knows to ask me the question above.

Spend Time With My Wife and Family
One aspect of my personality is that I tend to focus exclusively on one thing at a time (like blogging!). Being focused is good when I want to accomplish a task, but it’s bad when it results in neglecting my family. It is a trait that can also lend itself to a selfish inward bent. And that bent leads to temptation.  So it’s important for me to set aside time to spend with my wife and family.  It results in stronger relationships with them, and keeps me from temptation.

Avoid the Triggers
There are certain triggers for sexual temptations.  With some deliberate planning I can usually avoid those triggers. The example above (going to bed) is one of them. Here’s another example: I enjoy reading news online. Some good news sites also promote articles on the side that trigger temptation for me – typically stuff about celebrities or fashion or whatever. Some of the worst are the English/UK news sites. So I liberally apply firefox addblock to block all of the images on those sites. No images, no trigger, and I can still read the news. Your triggers may be different, and you know what they are.  If not, ask God, and he will point them out to you.  Identify them and plan accordingly.

This post is written by fellow blogger, Kevin Jackson.  The original post can be found here.  It is reposted here with his permission.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.


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Watching porn makes you want more porn

10/2/2014

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As Solomon said, sex is intoxicating (Song of Songs 1:4). To his students he wrote, “Rejoice in the wife of your youth...be intoxicated always in her love,” but do not get drunk on the embrace of a forbidden woman (Prov. 5:18-20)." 

Solomon had no knowledge of the human brain the way we do today, but his words on the intoxicating nature of sexuality take on a new richness as we study the effects of pornography on the mind and body. 

Two weeks after the Zillmann-Bryant experiment, all participants were given an assortment of pornographic and non-pornographic films to watch in private. Those who were exposed to more pornography were significantly more likely to want to watch hardcore porn. 

Continually watching pornography has been shown to produce an escalation effect. Fifteen years after this experiment, Dr. Zillmann continued research in this area, finding that the habitual use of pornography led to greater tolerance of sexually explicit material over time, requiring the viewer to consume more novel and bizarre material to achieve the same level of arousal or interest.18 

The hot-button issue today is the question of “porn addiction”—can someone become literally addicted to pornography? In a 2008 survey, over 90% of therapists believed a person could become addicted to cybersex.  Some have proposed calling this “hypersexual disorder,” and recent studies in neurochemistry confirm these findings. In his book Wired for Intimacy, Dr. William Struthers discusses at length the various hormones and neurotransmitters triggered by watching pornography. He writes: 

"As men fall deeper into the mental habit of fixating on these images, the exposure to them creates neural pathways. Like a path is created in the woods with each successive hiker, so do the neural paths set the course for the next time an erotic image is viewed. Over time these neural paths become wider as they are repeatedly traveled with each exposure to pornography. They become the automatic pathway through which interactions with women are routed. The neural circuitry anchors this process solidly in the brain. With each lingering stare, pornography deepens the Grand Canyon-like gorge in the brain through with images of women are destined to flow. This extends to women that they have not seen naked or engaging in sexual acts as well. All women become potential porn stars in the minds of these men."

Ultimately, the “addiction” label may or may not be helpful. There is no medically diagnosable line one crosses from being a non-addict to being an addict—it is a gradual move. Author Michael Leahy, a self-proclaimed recovering sex addict, has been to more than 200 college campuses with his Porn Nation: The Naked Truth presentation, and he says the No. 1 question he hears from college students is, “Can I look at porn recreationally without becoming addicted to it, and is there anything wrong with that?” Even in light of his past, Leahy chooses not to focus on the addictive character of pornography, but rather on its sexually exploitative message. “So,” Leahy responds, “do you think it’s okay if I beat and berate my wife just once a month? I mean, I’m not addicted to it.”  Usually reframing the question this way helps young men and women to see the problem of pornography differently.

Regardless of the specific labels we use, the intoxicating nature of pornography cannot be denied. The more we watch pornography, the more pornography we want to watch: it is like a toxin that gets into our blood. This is one great example of what Paul calls “the law of sin,” sin’s persuasive pull, which he says resides in the physical members of our bodies (Rom. 7:22-24). We can become captive to the impulses of our brains and bodies when they are trained by sinful indulgence. 

This post is taken from the booklet, YOUR BRAIN ON PORN by Luke Gilkerson.  The booklet can be found at:  http://www.covenanteyes.com/brain-ebook/

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.


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Would Jesus do that?

9/30/2014

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This picture represents an important concept in gaining ground on addictions and compulsions.  

If you observe this startling picture you will notice various things.  I don't even understand all that the artist intended as he has made several statements with this picture.

However, what stands out to me the most is the left arm of the man shooting up.  If you look carefully, you will see that it is actually Jesus' arm that is receiving the drug.  

There is an important concept to be learned here.  Did you know that what you do to yourself, you do to Jesus?  If you think this is a goofy idea, know that it is true.  Paul stated, "Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself?  Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute?  Never!"  

Do you abuse your body?  Do you abuse alcohol and/or other drugs?  Then you're causing Jesus to abuse his body.

Do you engage in sexual sin?  Do you let your mind wander into lust?  Then you're causing Jesus to sin sexually.

Does your mind ruminate on hateful thoughts?  Then you're causing Jesus to hate.

This concept is also consistent with David's statement to God, "Against you and you only have I sinned..."  All of our sin, is ultimately sin against God.  

Understanding this concept is important in conquering addictions and compulsions.  Pray, asking God to show you that when you sin, you are sinning against Him and involving Jesus in your sin.  Ask God to have His Holy Spirit prompt you, when you start entertaining sinful thoughts, to remember that you will be sinning against Him and involving Jesus in sinfulness.  

BE HOLY
BE A MAN


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Porn and sexist attitudes

9/19/2014

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Pornography has long held a controversial place in society, and its relationship with a number of behaviors and attitudes has been highly debated.

But the concern remains: How does viewing pornography affect our attitudes towards women? A recent paper published in the Journal of Communication found that exposure to pornography was related to and increased sexist attitudes, but only among a subgroup of users.

Gert Martin Hald, Theis Lange, University of Copenhagen, and Neil Malamuth, University of California, Los Angeles, asked 200 Danish adults aged 18-30 about their past pornography consumption; assessed a central part of their personality (the trait of agreeableness i.e., individual low in agreeableness typically holder higher levels of antagonism, coldness, hostility, suspiciousness, disagreeability, unfriendliness, and self-interest); and exposed them to hardcore pornography in the laboratory. They then evaluated how participants’ personality and the exposure to pornography affected a variety of sexist attitudes.

Among women increased past pornography consumption was not found to be associated with any of the sexist attitudes investigated. Among men increased past pornography consumption was initially found to be associated with more negative attitudes toward women including more hostility, negative prejudices, and stereotypes.

However, when the researchers actually exposed participants to pornography, personality (agreeableness) was found to influence the relationship between pornography and sexist attitudes so that it was only among participants low in agreeableness that pornography was found to increase sexist attitudes. Among this group it was found that laboratory exposure to pornography modestly increased hostile sexist attitudes. Further, this increase was found to be brought about by increases in sexual arousal to the pornographic exposure material. For all other participants, pornography exposure was found not to influence sexist attitudes.

“The study is important because it may help nuance the view of effects of porn and enable us to better understand for whom adverse effects of porn are most likely and the mechanisms by which such effects occur. This could be used in prevention, education, or clinical interventions,” said Hald, the lead author. “The study shows the importance of individual differences in research on pornography and underscores that effects of pornography on attitudes may not be the same for everyone”.

This post was taken from PSYPOST.  The original post can be found at:  http://www.psypost.org/2013/09/pornography-reinforces-sexist-attitudes-among-a-subgroup-of-heterosexuals-20077


BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.


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What porn does to intimacy

9/18/2014

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The rapid proliferation of pornography is one of the digital age’s legacies; some 40 million people in the United States visit porn websites regularly, many of them emerging or young adults. Popular media have capitalized on cautionary tales about porn addiction and stories of boyfriends objectifying their girlfriends and wanting them to behave like porn stars. But studies confirm that the preponderance of young men—and slightly less than half of women—thinks that watching sexually explicit material is okay. 

That’s what Spencer B. Olmstead and his colleagues found when they asked college students about the use of pornography in future romantic relationships: 70.8 percent of men and 45.5 percent of women thought they would watch. In contrast, only 22.3 percent of men and 26.3 percent of women thought pornography had no role in a romantic partnership.

Men and women tend to disagree on two issues: How porn is watched (alone, in groups, with a sexual partner); and how often it is watched. As Michael Kimmel reported in his 2008 book Guyland, young men often watch porn with their peers and for different reasons than older men. Kimmel writes that “guys tend to like the extreme stuff, the double penetrations and humiliating scenes. They watch it together with guys and they make fun of the women in the scene.” In contrast, older men with more experience either watch by themselves or with a partner, and with what Kimmel calls “wistfulness” about their younger selves; they tend to prefer material “where the women look like they are filled with desire and experience pleasure.”

The Olmstead study found that women’s concerns had more to do with whether consumption of porn was limited than whom it was watched with. Men tend to think that watching porn has only positive consequences.

As reported by Nathaniel Lambert and others in a review of studies, women whose partners watched porn regularly thought less of those partners and saw porn as more of a threat to the stability of their relationship. On the other hand, other studies have shown that young men and women alike think that sexually explicit material can help them explore their sexuality and adds “spice” to what they do in bed.

Is watching pornography really as benign as people think? The following three studies reveal that it has a greater effect on relationships than those we usually discuss.

1. Porn-free relationships are stronger, with a lower rate of infidelity.

That’s what Amanda Maddox and her colleagues found in a study of men and women, ages 18 to 34, who were in romantic relationships. The researchers measured the levels of negative communication, relationship adjustment, dedication or interpersonal commitment, sexual satisfaction, and infidelity. In their study, 76.8 percent of men and 34.6 percent of women looked at sexually explicit material alone; 44.8 percent reported viewing it with partners. They found that people who didn’t view any porn had lower levels of negative communication, were more committed to the relationship, and had higher sexual satisfaction and relationship adjustment. Their rate of infidelity was at least half of those who had watched sexual material alone and with their partners. But people who onlywatched porn with their partners were more dedicated to the relationship and more sexually satisfied than those who watched alone.

2. Watching porn diminishes relationship commitment.

What these researchers discovered is that watching porn reminds you of all the potential sexual partners out there, which in turn lowers your dedication to the person you’re actually involved with. It also leads you to swap out the person who’s actually lying in bed with you for some fantasy person you’ve never met (and probably never will).

Does that sound healthy?

Nathaniel Lambert, Sesen Negash and others conducted five separate experiments to find out. In the first, they asked participants, age 17 to 26, who were in relationships (as long as three years and as brief as two months) about their porn consumption and measured levels of commitment. They found that porn consumption lowered commitment in both men and women, but with a stronger effect on men.

In their second study, they had independent observers watch videos of couples performing an interactive task—one partner was blind-folded and had to draw something while the other gave instructions. Among the observers, lower commitment was observed among porn users.

The third study only tested participants who had consumed porn. They had half the group give up porn for three weeks. The other half was asked to give up their favorite food, but were allowed to watch porn. The result? Those who had abstained from sexually explicit material showed increased commitment to the relationship at the end of the three weeks.

The last two studies focused on the effect of greater attentiveness to alternatives on potential infidelity and infidelity itself. And yes, people who watched porn were more likely to engage in flirting (and more) outside their relationships in one experiment; and more likely to cheat and hook-up in the other.

3. The fantasy alternative leads to real-world cheating.

In another study, Andrea Mariea Gwinn, Nathaniel Lambert, and others further explored the nature of the other alternatives imaginatively offered up by pornography. They suggested two possibilities: First, that seeing physically attractive and sexually available partners on screen may heighten a person’s perceptions of his own possible partners. And second, that porn may make the idea of multiple sexual partners more appealing—another wound to a committed relationship.

And that’s exactly what they found.

In one study, the researchers found that people who thought about porn they’d watched reported having better alternatives to their current relationship than those who didn’t. A second study showed that, over time, exposure to porn was a robust predictor of infidelity.

More strikingly, the team found that both thinking about possible partners and acting on the impulse to find those alternatives operated separately from dissatisfaction with one's current relationship and partner. In other words, even though one's own pasture may be plenty green enough, just the thought of a greener one can be enough to send one roving.

You might want to keep that in mind if you’ve been watching the hard stuff or if you've become inured to seeing your partner just flip open his laptop "just for fun.”

Pornography is not as benign as you think, especially when it comes to romantic relationships.



This post is from Psychology Today, written by P Streep.  The original post can be found at:  http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/tech-support/201407/what-porn-does-intimacy



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