Men have within them this desire to always be looking for more.  That could be one of the definitions of a TOURNAMENT MALE.  Men have unusual abilities.   For example, a room can be full of men, yet some will attempt to monopolize the only woman in the room.

Men will be talking, many of them with their backs to the door.  A woman will enter the room and the men with their backs to the door will know, I don’t know how we know, but we know when a woman has entered the room.  Maybe we pick up on the observations of the other men that saw her first.  I don’t know how, but we men have this ability. 

A few moments after the woman enters, men will do one and/or two things: 
1) they will check her out, comparing her to their own wife or girlfriend, or if single, compare here with old girlfriends, and/or 2) they will approach her and start talking to her. 

There will ALWAYS be more than one man who chooses option #2.  Hence, the tournament is on…

Let me share with you my experience with being a TOURNAMENT MALE.

Before having been married for 10 years, we moved to Ecuador to counsel missionaries.  I was excited being on the mission field with a young wife and two sons. 

My office was in an English-speaking church in Quito.  On one occasion, we had a group of about six high school girls visit us from America and the Pastor and I took them to the hospital in Shell Mera.  We stopped at one very picturesque part of the Amazon Jungle where there was this waterfall that fed into the Amazon River.  The Pastor and the most attractive girl took off down the trail (she had been sitting in the front with him and they had been carrying on quite a conversation) and I waited back at the van and walked the remaining girls down the trail.  All the way down the trail, I was brooding.  I was thinking to myself, “why does he get to take off all alone with the prettiest girl and I’m stuck with these five?”  (continued)

If you remember from yesterday's post, I was at a Victoria's Secret being a dutiful husband and I was surrounded by three beautiful young women while Karyn was trying on clothes.

Well, my ego got the best of me.  I started thinking, "these girls think I'm hot.  They're talking to me because they really like me."  I found myself paying more attention to them while they were flirting with me (or I thought they were flirting with me).  Then it hit me.  "What in the world am I doing?  I'm almost old enough to be these young ladies' father!"  Then Karyn came out of the dressing room and paid for some clothes she was buying.  

When we got outside, I confessed to Karyn what had happened.  She simply said, "of course those sales clerks were talking to you, you're safe.  You're much older than them."  Well, I'll tell you, my ego was instantly deflated.  We continued our conversation and Karyn said that the clerks were occupying me so that she would spend more time shopping.  

Why do I share this story with you?  

Well I learned a few things about temptation:

- I said to myself before going into the store, "I can handle this."  God says, "So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don't fall."  Knowing this was a past temptation, it would have been wise to ask God for strength before entering.  It might have been better to just not go into that store.

- I have a big ego and I need to keep it in check.  "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."   If I stay humble, God will give me more grace.

- Temptation changes.  I thought that I had the sin of lust conquered.  However, this temptation played into something different.  I was on my guard for lust but not on guard for my ego.  

- My ego got in the way of my ability to think clearly.  These young ladies were just doing what they had been taught.  "Keep the hubby happy and his wife will buy more stuff."  I was being played and never realized it.

So, my conclusion, my goal of these two posts is this:

Do you let your ego go unchecked? 
 
Do you humble yourself so that God can give you more grace?

If you think that you have temptation conquered, get ready.  You will find yourself tempted in ways that you haven't been considering.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

Early in our marriage, we would receive Victoria's Secret catalogs in the mail.  Even back then, these catalogs were pornography.  They've only gotten worse.  

Nevertheless, I told Karyn about the draw those catalogs had for me and I asked her to not have those in the house, especially since we were raising boys.

By starving my eyes from those catalogs, they came to the point of having less attraction for me.  Over time, by telling Karyn about the things that turned me on, she was able to help me.  We would talk about those things that were tempting.  It was liberating to tell her and she would continue to love me and shield me from those things that held my attraction.  

After the boys were raised, I accompanied her to a Victoria's Secret store where she was trying on some clothes.  Being the dutiful husband, I went with her.  I thought, "I've gotten past that Victoria's Secret temptation.  I can handle this now."  

While I was sitting there, minding my own business and trying not to look at the images of scantily clad women on the walls, a very attractive young lady walked up to me and started talking to me.  I was polite and talked with her.  Then another attractive young lady and then another.  Before I knew it, I was surrounded by three very attractive young ladies (continued).

Maker of the Universe 
Phil Keaggy

The Maker of the universe, 
As Man for man was made a curse. 
The claims of Law which He had made, 
Unto the uttermost He paid. 

His holy fingers made the bough, 
Which grew the thorns that crowned His brow. 
The nails that pierced His hands were mined 
In secret places He designed. 

He made the forest whence there sprung 
The tree on which His body hung. 
He died upon a cross of wood, 
Yet made the hill on which it stood. 

The sky that darkened o'er His head, 
By Him above the earth was spread. 
The sun that hid from Him it's face 
By His decree was poised in space. 

The spear which spilled His precious blood 
Was tempered in the fires of God. 
The grave in which His form was laid 
Was hewn in rocks His hands had made. 

The throne on which He now appears 
Was His for everlasting years. 
But a new glory crowns His brow 
And every knee to Him shall bow.
 

Jesus is our example of a real man.  What does a real man do when he is faced with the inevitability of his death?  

Look at the way that Jesus handled His impending mission.  Jesus talked to His Father about His calling to die.  He spent significant time telling His Father how He felt about what was about to happen.  He took His best friends with Him but He didn't allow His friends to dissuade Him due to their inability to be supportive.  

The day of His crucifixion, He spent time with His followers and let them know what was going to happen.  His death was to happen during Passover.  During Passover, a tradition is to sing the Hallel Psalms, chapters 113-118.  They are to be sung as a prayer.  What is interesting is chapter 118, the last scripture that Jesus and the His disciples sang.  Jesus knew what He was going to go thru.  Look at some of the key words that Jesus sang:

What can man do to me?

I will look in triumph over my enemies.

It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.

They surrounded me on every side but in the name of the LORD I cut them off.

The LORD is my strength and my song, He has become my salvation.

I will not die, but live.  I will proclaim what the LORD has done.

This is the day the LORD has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.

Give thanks to the LORD for He is good.

His love endures forever.

So, the conclusion...  When you know that you are going to face a severe trial, face it like a man.  Be like Jesus.  Spend time with your LORD and have confidence that you will emerge victorious because HIS LOVE ENDURES FOREVER.  

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

I've always wondered what it would have been like to be present at Jesus' crucifixion.    I wondered if I would have joined the disciples and disappeared.  Or would I be like the only disciple, John, who stayed to witness Jesus death.

I was fortunate to be granted the opportunity to see Jesus being crucified.  However, having been a participant in the Easter Musical, I became, at times, a little complacent about Jesus' crucifixion.  It became a matter of rehearsal and the actor playing Jesus was a friend.  However, one practice, I was struck with the reality of Jesus' compassion and love, how He died for me.  

I walked onto stage and Jesus was on the cross.  I looked up and just at that time, Jesus was looking down at me.  I forgot that this man was an actor and my friend.  I felt transported to the time that Jesus' was actually on the cross.  I felt so overwhelmed.  Jesus was looking at me and I was the only person there even though the stage and the audience was filled with people.  

It was Jesus and me.

Nevertheless, I  was overwhelmed by two competing emotions:  1) I felt ashamed at my sin, and 2) I felt pure love.  I felt no condemnation.  A flood of tears came to my eyes and at that night's performance, I didn't have to pretend to cry.  My complacency vanished.


My tears were real.  

Jesus was real.  

My sin was real.  

The love I felt was real.

The forgiveness Jesus offered was real.


Salvation is real.


BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

Yesterday, I posted about how a young man used the retelling of the crucifixion of Jesus so that he could sin and take others with him in his sin.

Today, I want to share something beautiful from my experiences with the Easter Musical.  In this church that annually would share the Easter story with its community, there was always a special private showing of the final dress rehearsal.  

The final dress rehearsal was an invitation to individuals who were physically as well as mentally challenged.   The church would clear out much of the seating so that people using wheelchairs, walkers, crutches and canes could easily navigate into the auditorium.  This was a fun tradition in this community because these individuals got to see the musical before anybody else.  

In this final dress rehearsal that I am remembering, Jesus was being taken down from the cross. This is a very solemn and quiet scene, taking a good ten minutes or so.  Jesus is carefully removed from the cross, given to Mary, Joseph of Arimathea, John and Nicodemus.  They lovingly prepare Jesus' body for burial, wrapping him in cloths.  

Well, during this scene, one man in the audience who couldn't speak or walk due to his challenges, started weeping uncontrollably.   It was quite a poignant scene that was enhanced by this man's sensitivity.   I firmly believe that this man was so touched by this reenactment that he said yes to God's invitation to accept Jesus as his Savior.  Needless to say, this man's behavior affected many others not only in the congregation but many of the actors and orchestra members as well.  In my own heart, I felt a revival of my own commitment to serving Jesus.  I'm sure that many had a similar experience.  An unspoken revival of sorts happened right there because of this man's sensitivity to Jesus' gift of salvation.

I want to tell you that the man that was weeping was so much more of a man than many men I have ever met.  Especially, more so than that young man from yesterday who wanted to have sexual conquests to prove his manhood.  That weeping man allowed God to transform him.  Outside he was still the same but I believe that man left the church a new creation.

You may be wondering how the above picture of the extreme mountain climber fits into this story.  Well, I'm thinking that when this guy gets to heaven, he's gonna want to do the things he always wanted to do but couldn't because he was  in an earthly body that didn't work as he wanted.  I'm gonna find him and we're gonna do some extreme mountain climbing.  When we get to the summit, I'm gonna ask him, "remember when you were at that private showing of the Easter Musical?  I want to know what you were thinking."  I anticipate he will share with me his love for God and how the Holy Spirit worked in his life that night.

Together we will agree with the Roman Centurion, "Surely, this man was the Son of God!"  and we will spend a couple hundred years on that summit praising our Savior and recalling all the wonderful things that God did.  

Do you want to experience something beautiful?  

You can right now as you ask Jesus to lead your life, turn from your sinfulness and allow God to transform you. 

We want you to join us on that summit in eternity.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

There have been a few times when I have been so angry, that I felt like slugging someone...

Let me set this up for you.  The church that I attended would put on a terrific Easter Musical every year.  It was a great production and much of the community would go.  It was quite popular.   I enjoyed being part of it.

I was at a fast food establishment and I overheard a conversation that I wish I had never heard.  Two young men were talking about the Easter Musical.  Since I was in the production, I listened intentionally.  Then they started talking to each other about how to pick up girls.  I heard the usual stupid man advice about showing off, flexing your muscles, driving a fast car, flattering, flirting, etc.  

However, what I heard next was REALLY DISGUSTING.   

I wish I hadn't been listening.

One young man said, "I take girls to that Easter Musical that's going on right now.   I cry when Jesus is on the cross and they get all emotional.  Then, when I get them home, they are  like putty in my hands.  I can do anything I want and they never say no."  He continued, "If I can't get a girl to go with me, I will hang out afterwards and talk to the girls that have been crying.  It's pretty easy to pick one up when they're like that."  It made my blood boil.  I wanted to slug the guy or say something but I was so angry and in such shock, I just sat there in disbelief.

Did you catch what was DISGUSTING about that conversation?  God talks about this.  He says, "They commit adultery with their eyes, and their desire for sin is never satisfied.  They lure unstable people into sin..."  

Why is this disgusting?

Did you catch what this young man said?  He took the most wonderful and supreme act of love and perverted it for his own selfish, sinful advantage.  And not only that, he took others with him.  

Do you find that disgusting?

I have talked about several disgusting things on this blog.  What makes this the most disgusting thing I have ever heard?  

Do you understand the gravity of this young man's statements?

It is downright disgusting to use something that is holy for sin.  To defile God's holiness with sin is a major affront to God.  This conversation gave me a whole different perspective on God's Holiness and what it means to be a man.  

A real man takes God's Holiness seriously.  That doesn't mean that a real man can't have fun and can't make light of some things that happen, even in a church.  But a real man knows better than to defile God with sin.   God and sin can NEVER be connected, even the slightest connection is abhorrent to God.

Do you defile God's Holiness?  Do you take Him seriously?  

God says we are to be holy in all we do.  Never connect God to sin.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

If you recall from the previous post, we have a man who is being enticed by his own desire.  An innocent phone call has lead to more...

As I was telling this man about the potential disaster coming, he said, 


"Funny you should say that..."  He  then proceeded with this all to0 familiar story:

This young lady suggested that they meet.  It was a town that he visited on business often.   She explained that she offered private services to help men feel more masculine and perform better in bed.  She explained that he would enjoy it as "most men do."  

He went to the house that she and several other young women (who were working their way thru college too)  used to "help men."  There was never any intercourse.  He was "learning how to let a woman be in charge."   He found these lessons exhilarating.  He paused in his story, "but, I'm not cheating!!! We aren't having sex and I really like how she makes me feel."  It's as if he was trying to convince himself more than he was trying to convince me.  

I would love to be able to tell you that this man conquered this illicit behavior but I cannot.  His life became a disaster.  

One night when he was talking to this young woman on the phone, his wife happened to be listening on the extension.  The next day, when he got home from work, he found his belongings on the yard, the locks changed and a court injunction prohibiting him from ever seeing his wife again.  The divorce proceedings were quick and he soon found himself on the street with no home.

I haven't had any contact with him since.  I don't know where he is and I don't know if he got help.  I do pray for him, hoping that he has turned to God and is living a life that represents Christ well.

Why do I tell you this story?  I guess you need to know that it is easy for men to rationalize their sinful behavior.   Men have a tendency to compartmentalize their behavior and think that their lives cannot be affected.  

God has something to say about this.  ‎"The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out. But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind. I get to the heart of the human. I get to the root of things. I treat them as they really are, not as they pretend to be."   

So, what is in your heart?  
Are you pretending?  
Ask God to give you a new heart.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.