If you remember from yesterday's post, we were discussing a man who decided that he found a woman who would fulfill his fantasy.  

His fantasy was one that he played over and over in his mind, just like the movie he played over and over on his DVD player.  In this fantasy, he would follow a woman who just purchased lingerie.  As she walked from the store, she would turn and look back in a flirtatious manner on her way to her car and then he would follow her.  He imagined she would drive to a secluded area where she had kept her lingerie on from trying it on in the store and then they would have a sexual encounter in his van or even better, she would drive to a motel and they would share a room.

Do you see how distorted this man's reasoning is?  What woman, in reality, would actually do what he is fantasizing?  But that's what happens to men who view porn, they think all women are ready for sex when a man wants to have sex.  

He spotted this particular  woman and realized that he had seen her several times before in the mall.  On one occasion, he thought she had actually looked at him and smiled.  That meant that she wanted to have a liaison with him.  

He followed her down the mallway.  She would turn and look back every so often and he felt encouraged.  He knew his fantasy was going to be a reality!

What this man did not know because his reasoning was so out of whack is that the woman was fearful.  She was looking back because she was watching him.  She didn't like that he was following her.  

She went to her car quickly (which he interpreted that she was so excited that she wanted to get to their encounter rapidly) and he got into his car and followed her as she drove away.    She drove a rather circuitous route and he was closely following her, fantasizing about what was about to happen.

The next thing he knew, he was awakened from his fantasized induced stupor when she pulled into a parking space at the local police station.   

This man was fortunate, he had enough reasoning to realize he was about to be in trouble.  He quickly drove off and went home.  That was when he finally understood that he needed help.  That's when he called  a counselor to get help.

I won't get into this man's counseling as that is not the point of these posts; however, suffice it to say this was a turning point for him.  He decided he needed to change.  He was lucky.  He wasn't charged with a crime.  He could be sitting behind bars.

Do you catch the point of these two posts?  

Pornography always takes.  It never gives up.  It is insidious.  It ruins a man. 

It changes the way you think.

Dump your stash.  
Stop watching "adult" programming.  
Get rid of those movies.
Stop wasting time on the internet.
Ask your pastor for help.

Be a real man.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

Men who read and watch a lot of pornography have active imaginations and often live in a fantasy world.  Pornography messes with a man's mind. His reasoning changes.  

Men who are avid fans of pornography develop an unusual perspective on women.  They view women as sex objects.  They forget that woman have their own motives, ideas and plans.  

Many times women's motives, ideas and plans do not include men.  

A man with an addiction to pornography cannot understand the previous sentence.  

These men cannot imagine that women are really not always "on the prowl" looking for sexual encounters.  What these men forget is that almost all pornography is written and directed by men.  Therefore, men who use pornography develop a perspective of women that women exist just for men's satisfaction.  These men's minds have become programmed by the pornographers.

When men get this distorted perspective of women, they are prone to act out.  They have fantasies and often want to do what they see on TV and the computer.  

Let me tell about one man's reprehensible actions.  This man had a fantasy that he would encounter a woman he did not know who would be wanting to have sex with him.

This man would spend a fair amount to time in the mall, sitting outside of women's clothing stores deciding which woman would be the one with whom he would have sex.  

He saw a certain woman and decided that he found a woman who would fulfill his fantasy...       (click here for part two)

If you remember yesterday, we were talking about a man who got started with pornography at age 8.   This man started to act upon his fantasies from the porn that he had been viewing over the years.  

One of his fantasies was that he would "accidentally" leave his zipper down and a woman would notice and become aroused.   He would walk around in grocery stores with his zipper down, fantasizing about his inevitable sexual encounter.  He  was disappointed that no women  noticed.

So, he developed another plan.  He decided that he would sit in his car close to the exits of stores with his pants open and hope that women would see and become aroused.  That didn't work either.  

So, his next step would be to call women over to his car, "to ask a question" and hope that with his pants open, they would notice and want to be with him.   He continued to be very disappointed.

He thought, because of his distorted perspective of women and sexuality, that what women were wanting to see was that he was sexually aroused, that he was erect, ready for sex.  So, he would sit in his car and fantasize about a woman jumping into his car and they would drive to a secluded place for a sexual encounter.  

One morning, while he was sitting in his car masturbating and fantasizing, he rolled his window down and asked a woman to come over because he had a "question" he wanted to ask her.  She approached his car, looked at him and where his hand was and instantly became repulsed.  She noted his license plate and called the police when she got home.  

She made a report to the police and he was arrested and prosecuted.  His prosecution was made public, his family was embarrassed and he lost his job.  

As he finished his story, I asked, "have you gotten rid of your porn?"  I knew his answer would be "no."  I was right.  The court wanted recommendations at the end of my assessment.  My recommendations were necessary:  no cable tv, no vcr/dvd player, no internet, no smart phone, no porn.  If he was caught in possession of any of these items, he would go to prison.  Also, he needed intensive counseling.  If this failed, then he would need residential treatment.

However, what happened, when the judge found out that he had not given up his porn, he acted swiftly.  This man immediately went to prison.  

Wouldn't it be nice if all of my stories ended in a positive note?  

This is a depressing, disgusting story.

Porn wins.

"Behold, you have sinned against the LORD and be sure that your sin will find you out."

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.