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Fleeing prostitution

5/3/2013

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A local woman's life took a turn for the worse when she encountered an escort service.

The couple who ran the escort service took her in, and the man became her pimp.

At first, he offered protection and fed her drug habit. He groomed her with a dream of money and security. She sold sex at ritzy parties and rode in flashy cars around the Puget Sound region.

Eventually, the pimp brainwashed her into submission and ruled every aspect of her life. He collected all of her earnings and kept track of her whereabouts at all times via cellphone.

If she failed to earn a daily quota of $1,500, she was beaten and humiliated. He would urinate on her. He whipped her with an electrical cord.

"That was his way of showing me this is just the beginning of what will happen," said the woman, who requested anonymity for this story out of fear the pimp could retaliate. "I was more afraid of the pimp than the johns."

The pimp found customers (known as johns) through the internet, Craigslist and alt-weekly papers. Her earnings paid for a house in SeaTac for the pimp and his wife. Thousands of dollars in tricks paid for hotel rooms around the Puget Sound region, including Federal Way and the infamous Aurora Avenue in Seattle. She also worked to pay back the cost of those ads, or pay back bail money if she went to jail.

The johns hailed from all walks of life. Some johns reviewed her services online. Johns would ask for particular kind of girls, which was useful information for pimps.

"I had wigs," she said. "Sometimes they'd say, 'I want a blonde.'"

In a typical transaction, the prostitute took care of business with a john while the pimp waited in an adjacent hotel room to collect the money and monitor the time.

The lifestyle left the woman with no choice but to hustle for more money, or face the wrath of her pimp. She recruited other women into the lifestyle to shoulder some of the workload when johns were seeking services at the same time. Several sessions with johns doubled as drug deals. Pimps pressured women to exploit naive customers with blackmail, for example, such as threatening to tell a john's wife unless he paid hush money.

In total, she had eight prostitution arrests on her record, including an undercover bust in Federal Way. Abused as a child, she was walking Pacific Highway in search of paying customers by age 15. Drugs like heroin became a way to numb herself and cope with the streets, where she had sex to survive.

"I had to be high," she said. "I had to feel nothing."

In a twist of fate, a heroin overdose inadvertently marked the turning point in reclaiming her life. While she was hospitalized, the pimp was jailed after a violent spree in search of her.

She formed relationships with people who empowered her. Now in her mid-thirties, she is no longer a victim, but a survivor. She is married. She lives clean and sober with a career in the mental health field. She regained custody of her three children from foster care, and now helps other mothers in similar situations. She hopes to see more reforms in the child welfare system to ensure that youth avoid these abusive relationships.

"My thanks goes to God for sending a man who was a defender of women," she said, referring to Nick Lembo, who with his wife, Jo, provided a support outlet through Overcomer Covenant Church in Auburn.

"The more eyes and ears on the ground," said Jo Lembo, "the smaller a pimp's world gets."

Ending demand

A grass-roots movement is under way to end the demand for prostitution, which is tangled in a web of pornography and cultural attitudes.

Prostitution has shifted away from the typical streetwalkers. Nowadays, johns arrange meetings online. Federal Way Police Chief Brian Wilson said officers can put an ad on Craigslist, meet with a potential john and make an arrest, all in a span of two hours.

In 2012, there were 12 prostitution-related investigations in Federal Way, Wilson said, with nine of those initiated by police and one involving a 15-year-old girl.

"It's much more underground now," Wilson said during a forum on human trafficking Jan. 9 at City Hall. "This is not a Federal Way issue. It's a regional issue."

According to the former prostitute whose story was told above, the deck is stacked against police. An officer must witness a transaction before making an arrest. When police arrest one prostitute, her pimp will find a replacement and take business to another part of the region.

"There's not much the police can do," said the woman, suggesting a solution for ending demand: spread awareness among youth.

One place to start is by reshaping the perceptions young men have toward women. Some argue the negative influence of pornography on the male sexual identity, including the accompanying message of objectifying women leads to the creation of unrealistic expectations from sex.

While there is nothing wrong with sex, young men need to be educated on how to use and understand it, according to Nick Lembo from Defenders and Shared Hope International.

"Sex is the most powerful stimulant and bonding agent on the planet," he said at the Federal Way forum. "We need to teach men to respect, honor and understand women and build wholesome relationships."

Peter Qualliotine, co-founder of Organization for Prostitution Survivors, said a boy's average age of exposure to pornography is 9. Prostitution and pornography are inseparable, he said at the Federal Way forum, and "one does not exist without the other."

The key to overcoming this obstacle, he said, is to teach young men to eroticize the mutual and consensual parts of sex, instead of the objectified images found in porn.

This post was written by Andy Hobbs.  For the original article, go to:  http://www.federalwaymirror.com/news/187019821.html


BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.


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Killing babies

4/12/2013

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In testimony that shocked Florida legislators, a lobbyist for Planned Parenthood explained that “her organization believes the decision to kill an infant who survives a failed abortion should be left up to the woman seeking an abortion and her abortion doctor.” But what else should we expect from an organization that has made countless millions of dollars off the killing of unborn babies?

As reported March 29, 2012 by the Weekly Standard, these legislators were “considering a bill to require abortionists to provide medical care to an infant who survives an abortion,” similar to the Born Alive Protection Act that Barack Obama voted against four times before he was president.

Rep. Jim Boyd was so taken aback by the testimony of Alisa LaPolt Snow, the Planned Parenthood lobbyist, that he said to her, “So, um, it is just really hard for me to even ask you this question because I’m almost in disbelief. If a baby is born on a table as a result of a botched abortion, what would Planned Parenthood want to have happen to that child that is struggling for life?”

She replied, “We believe that any decision that’s made should be left up to the woman, her family, and the physician.”

What? The baby survives an abortion in a Planned Parenthood clinic and is fighting for its life, and Planned Parenthood isn’t willing to say, “Yes, we want to see the baby’s life saved”? Of course not. If it was up to the mother and doctor to terminate the baby’s life inside the womb, why not continue the barbaric act outside the womb?

Rep. Jose Oliva, also incredulous, asked Snow, “You stated that a baby born alive on a table as a result of a botched abortion that that decision should be left to the doctor and the family. Is that what you’re saying?”

Snow replied, “That decision should be between the patient and the health care provider,” to which Oliva rightly countered, “I think that at that point the patient would be the child struggling on the table, wouldn’t you agree?”

Snow was obviously caught off guard and could only reply, “That’s a very good question. I really don’t know how to answer that. I would be glad to have some more conversations with you about this.”

In other words, even I can’t pretend to defend my own ridiculous position here.


This post was written by Michael Brown.  For the original post, go to:  http://townhall.com/columnists/michaelbrown/2013/04/01/planned-parenthood-confirms-its-babykiller-status-n1554041

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

4 Comments

Now for something disgusting...

2/25/2013

2 Comments

 
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There have been a few times when I have been so angry, that I felt like slugging someone...

Let me set this up for you.  The church that I attended would put on a terrific Easter Musical every year.  It was a great production and much of the community would go.  It was quite popular.   I enjoyed being part of it.

I was at a fast food establishment and I overheard a conversation that I wish I had never heard.  Two young men were talking about the Easter Musical.  Since I was in the production, I listened intentionally.  Then they started talking to each other about how to pick up girls.  I heard the usual stupid man advice about showing off, flexing your muscles, driving a fast car, flattering, flirting, etc.  

However, what I heard next was REALLY DISGUSTING.   

I wish I hadn't been eavesdropping.

One young man said, "I take girls to that Easter Musical that's going on right now.   I cry when Jesus is on the cross and they get all emotional.  Then, when I get them home, they are  like putty in my hands.  I can do anything I want and they never say no."  He continued, "If I can't get a girl to go with me, I will hang out afterwards and talk to the girls that have been crying.  It's pretty easy to pick one up when they're like that."  It made my blood boil.  I wanted to slug the guy or say something but I was so angry and in such shock, I just sat there in disbelief.

Did you catch what was DISGUSTING about that conversation?  God talks about this.  He says, "They commit adultery with their eyes, and their desire for sin is never satisfied.  They lure unstable people into sin..."  

Why is this disgusting?

Did you catch what this young man said?  He took the most wonderful and supreme act of love and perverted it for his own selfish, sinful advantage.  And not only that, he took others with him.  

Do you find that disgusting?

I have talked about several disgusting things on this blog.  What makes this the most disgusting thing I have ever heard?  

Do you understand the gravity of this young man's statements?

It is downright disgusting to use something that is holy for sin.  To defile God's holiness with sin is a major affront to God.  This conversation gave me a whole different perspective on God's Holiness and what it means to be a man.  

A real man takes God's Holiness seriously.  That doesn't mean that a real man can't have fun and can't make light of some things that happen, even in a church.  But a real man knows better than to defile God with sin.   God and sin can NEVER be connected, even the slightest connection is abhorrent to God.

Do you defile God's Holiness?  Do you take Him seriously?  

God says we are to be holy in all we do.  Never connect God to sin.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.


2 Comments

The Garbage Collector

1/18/2013

9 Comments

 
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Where can porn take you?  I met a man who confessed to me that he digs thru the garbage dump to collect his porn.  

This man belongs to a very conservative sect of Christianity where one does not use electricity.   Because he is so separated from modern culture, I asked him how he became addicted to porn.  His answer was astonishing.  "I was dumping some trash out of a garbage bin and I saw a Playboy in the dump with the centerfold laying open."  He had never seen anything like this.  He had heard about "centerfolds" and was always intrigued but was thankful that those "worldly temptations" were something he never had to deal with.  Nevertheless, He quickly grabbed this magazine and tucked it down his pants.  Later that day, when he was alone, he ogled this picture and found himself extremely attracted to the naked woman.  He started to fantasize about her and then masturbated to her seductive image.

To me, the message was clear but lost on him:   Porn is garbage.  It belongs in the garbage.  It should stay in the garbage.  Garbage in, garbage out.  

What the garbage collector didn't know is that porn is insidious.  Porn never gives up.  It keeps taking and taking, offering false feelings of comfort until you end up doing things that you never imagined.

It didn't take long before centerfolds were no longer satisfying to him.  He started noticing, at the dump while looking for more centerfolds, other pictures.  In these pictures, there were women posing seductively with animals.  These pictures sparked further prurient interests for him.  He started attempting to have sex with his goat.  Over time, he moved on to other animals.  His addiction finally caught up with him when he found himself naked in the pig pen on all fours.  That's when he came to his senses and realized that he really, really, really had a problem.  

He was fortunate, because if he had been caught during these activities, he would have been charged with a crime.  Zoophilia is illegal in many U.S. states.  The medical issues that can occur are numerous.  However, the legal charges and the medical issues are not as severe as the toll that such behavior takes on a man's soul.  

More than zoophilia is the duplicity that this man lived.   He would go to church regularly and then engage in these detestable behaviors at other times.  That's what the sin of porn does.  It causes a man to pretend to be holy.  His energy ends up being consumed by things that weaken him rather than strengthen him. 

You may be thinking, "Porn will never do that to me.   I can control it."  However, let me assure you, porn will win.  It always does.  

Porn is garbage.  It belongs in the garbage.  It should stay in the garbage.  Garbage in, garbage out.  

If you are looking  at porn, stop.  Get rid of your stash.  Tell your pastor about your decision.  Become accountable to a counselor and a men's support group. 

With God's help, you can stop.  


BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

9 Comments

The People of Wal-Mart

7/28/2012

11 Comments

 
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A Christian friend of mine recently confessed on her Facebook page that she wouldn't be caught dead at Wal-Mart and then went on to make fun of the people that shopped there.  

That was bad.  

What was "badder" was that several people commented, making further disparaging comments about the people that shop at Wal-Mart.  


Their comments really hit me wrong.  

I think I know why.  I can see myself making the same comments.  Okay, maybe not the same comments, but I certainly think them.  

I have Christian friends who talk about the "ghetto Target" or the "poor people's Krogers" and they talk about how they would "never" go to "those kinds of places."  "Those are dirty places filled with dirty, rude people."

Then I think about the times that I prayed at the "fancy restaurant" and then was rude to the waitstaff.  

I have Christian friends who would "never ride the bus" because all of the homeless, poor people who ride the bus.   I hear, "I'm scared of those people.  I can't stand to be around them.  I can smell them before they even get close."

Then I think of times that I have ignored people I don't know and avoid people who are different from me. 

As I write this post, I'm having a hard time defining who I am writing this to. 

I want to say something to my Christian friends about their behavior.  
I want to tell them that Jesus would never act like that.  

But I can't say those things.  
I have no right.  
I'm just as guilty, IF NOT MORE.

LORD, forgive me.
Help me to be more like Jesus.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

11 Comments

God in a Brothel

6/8/2012

1 Comment

 
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Though he looked the part, Daniel Walker was not a typical Western visitor to brothels in Asia.  Playing the part of a lonely tourist, Walker was actually an undercover agent investigating the sex trade industry in various locations around the globe.  Knowing his life would be in danger if he were exposed, Walker was moved by more than a paycheck.  In his book God in a Brothel, it becomes clear that Walker's overriding motivation to rescue girls and women trapped in this brutal form of slavery was God's great love for each and every one of them.  

Human trafficking is a present-day reality about which many of us would prefer not to think.  No modern invention, it was the situation in which God's people suffered under the rule of the Egyptians, enslaved to construct Egypt's buildings as forced laborers.  In the midst of their suffering -- just as in the midst of our own experiences of suffering -- it would have been tempting to give up hope in the God who had called them His own.  And yet, instead of relinquishing trust, the Hebrew people continued to cry out to God for deliverance for four hundred years.  The One who loved them heard their cries, saw their misery, and was concerned for their suffering.  

In the midst of suffering, it's tempting to believe that God does not care or that God has abandoned us.  The truth is that bodies which are used and abused, broken and beaten, matter deeply to God.  God does not turn away from the suffering of a young woman being trafficked for profit.  God does not ignore the cries of  the needy.  Rather, the One who used Moses to deliver His people out of captivity is the One to whom you can turn in the midst of your suffering.  

God sees your suffering and hears your cries.

This post is taken from Today in the Word, June 3, 2012.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

1 Comment

Hogging

5/14/2012

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The young man told me an unbelievable story.  He was telling me about an activity that was popular in his college dorm.  It was called "hogging."  

As he explained what this activity was, it became clear to me that this young man was engaging in a very sinful and demeaning sexual activity.  By many standards, his behavior was considered deviant and misogynous.

Clearly, hogging is when a man purposely seeks out an overweight or unattractive woman to satisfy his sexual appetite.  Many times, it is a game, a form of competition that men do to see who can have sex with the largest woman.  It is not unusual for a group of men at a bar decide to "spice up" the most overweight or unattractive woman or it occurs when it is close to bar closing and a man decided he will "settle" for this woman rather than go home alone.  This type of behavior is disgusting, despicable and wrong on so many levels.    

This young man was starting to feel a twinge of guilt for his behavior.  The night before he was involved in a "rodeo" where his friends hid in his bedroom and took  pictures of his sexual activity and then jumped out and surprised the woman, humiliating her and telling her it was all a competition.  This last encounter ended with the young woman breaking down in tears, angrily crying hysterically and threatening to call the police for sexual assault.  

It's disgusting the path that sin takes in men's lives.  The desire to seek sexual thrills coupled with competition makes men stupid.  This selfishness leads to treating people like objects, forgetting that other people have needs and feelings as well.  

His behavior reminded me of a section of the Bible where Paul is speaking to first generation Christians:  "Don't you know that wicked people won't inherit the kingdom of God?  Stop deceiving yourselves!  People who continue to commit sexual sins..."  Then Paul reminds them that even though they have engaged in sexual sins, that they have changed...  "That's what some of you were!  But you have been washed and made holy, and you have received God's approval..."  

This young man didn't have a Christian heritage on which to build, just like these first generation Christians.  He thought that what he was doing was "normal, what guys do."  Fortunately, the Holy Spirit was speaking to him, letting him know that abusing women and seeking sexual thrills and competition is not "normal." And he was listening...

God takes pleasure in uprightness, in those who seek to please Him before pleasing their own sensual desires and selfishness.  

This young man changed for the better.  He is now walking in righteousness, seeking God's will for his life.   He is forgiven.  He is now made holy.  He is receiving God's approval.

God changed this young man. 

Can you? 
Yes.

Will you? 
Yes.

Allow God to change you. 

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

0 Comments

Caught in the parking lot (part two)

2/28/2012

2 Comments

 
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If you remember yesterday, we were talking about a man who got started with pornography at age 8.   This man started to act upon his fantasies from the porn that he had been viewing over the years.  

One of his fantasies was that he would "accidentally" leave his zipper down and a woman would notice and become aroused.   He would walk around in grocery stores with his zipper down, fantasizing about his inevitable sexual encounter.  He  was disappointed that no women  noticed.

So, he developed another plan.  He decided that he would sit in his car close to the exits of stores with his pants open and hope that women would see and become aroused.  That didn't work either.  

So, his next step would be to call women over to his car, "to ask a question" and hope that with his pants open, they would notice and want to be with him.   He continued to be very disappointed.

He thought, because of his distorted perspective of women and sexuality, that what women were wanting to see was that he was sexually aroused, that he was erect, ready for sex.  So, he would sit in his car and fantasize about a woman jumping into his car and they would drive to a secluded place for a sexual encounter.  

One morning, while he was sitting in his car masturbating and fantasizing, he rolled his window down and asked a woman to come over because he had a "question" he wanted to ask her.  She approached his car, looked at him and where his hand was and instantly became repulsed.  She noted his license plate and called the police when she got home.  

She made a report to the police and he was arrested and prosecuted.  His prosecution was made public, his family was embarrassed and he lost his job.  

As he finished his story, I asked, "have you gotten rid of your porn?"  I knew his answer would be "no."  I was right.  The court wanted recommendations at the end of my assessment.  My recommendations were necessary:  no cable tv, no vcr/dvd player, no internet, no smart phone, no porn.  If he was caught in possession of any of these items, he would go to prison.  Also, he needed intensive counseling.  If this failed, then he would need residential treatment.

However, what happened, when the judge found out that he had not given up his porn, he acted swiftly.  This man immediately went to prison.  

Wouldn't it be nice if all of my stories ended in a positive note?  

This is a depressing, disgusting story.

Porn wins.

"Behold, you have sinned against the LORD and be sure that your sin will find you out."

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

2 Comments

The most disgusting thing I have ever heard

2/15/2012

6 Comments

 
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There have been a few times when I have been so angry, that I felt like slugging someone...

Let me set this up for you.  The church that I attended would put on a terrific Easter Musical every year.  It was a great production and much of the community would go.  It was quite popular.   I enjoyed being part of it.

I was at a fast food establishment and I overheard a conversation that I wish I had never heard.  Two young men were talking about the Easter Musical.  Since I was in the production, I listened intentionally.  Then they started talking to each other about how to pick up girls.  I heard the usual stupid man advice about showing off, flexing your muscles, driving a fast car, flattering, flirting, etc.  

However, what I heard next was REALLY DISGUSTING.   

I wish I hadn't been listening.

One young man said, "I take girls to that Easter Musical that's going on right now.   I cry when Jesus is on the cross and they get all emotional.  Then, when I get them home, they are  like putty in my hands.  I can do anything I want and they never say no."  He continued, "If I can't get a girl to go with me, I will hang out afterwards and talk to the girls that have been crying.  It's pretty easy to pick one up when they're like that."  It made my blood boil.  I wanted to slug the guy or say something but I was so angry and in such shock, I just sat there in disbelief.

Did you catch what was DISGUSTING about that conversation?  God talks about this.  He says, "They commit adultery with their eyes, and their desire for sin is never satisfied.  They lure unstable people into sin..."  

Why is this disgusting?

Did you catch what this young man said?  He took the most wonderful and supreme act of love and perverted it for his own selfish, sinful advantage.  And not only that, he took others with him.  

Do you find that disgusting?

I have talked about several disgusting things on this blog.  What makes this the most disgusting thing I have ever heard?  

Do you understand the gravity of this young man's statements?

It is downright disgusting to use something that is holy for sin.  To defile God's holiness with sin is a major affront to God.  This conversation gave me a whole different perspective on God's Holiness and what it means to be a man.  

A real man takes God's Holiness seriously.  That doesn't mean that a real man can't have fun and can't make light of some things that happen, even in a church.  But a real man knows better than to defile God with sin.   God and sin can NEVER be connected, even the slightest connection is abhorrent to God.

Do you defile God's Holiness?  Do you take Him seriously?  

God says we are to be holy in all we do.  Never connect God to sin.

BE HOLY.
BE A MAN.

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