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How to look at porn & not get caught

8/20/2012

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It’s no secret—porn is taking down church leaders left and right. If you’ve been in ministry for any time you’ve either: 1) watched a close friend lose their ministry because of it or 2) struggled with some form of pornography yourself.

Viewing porn is a major obstacle to experiencing the abundant life God gives us freely through the cross. Porn is enslaving and we were meant to be free. In recent studies we’ve also learned that viewing pornography makes us more likely to have an affair, more vulnerable to divorce, depression, and the guilt involved can often become numbing—rendering us ineffective for life and ministry. In short, viewing porn gives the enemy freedom to ruin our relationships, our ministries, and our churches.

As ministry leaders we need to do everything we can to protect ourselves. If we don’t take the necessary precautions—and stay intentional—we will leave ourselves open to this not-so-subtle sexual sin.   

Maybe you’ve never seen porn (although, I doubt it) or maybe you’re a recovering addict—no matter where you are on the spectrum, this (Screwtape-esque) list explores the ways in which we leave ourselves open to today’s most ardent leadership killer.   

10 Easy Ways to Look at Porn Without Getting Caught

1. Work late at night in a secluded office.  Sooner or later the temptation will sneak up on you. Access and solitude make a powerful mix for secret actions. No one will be around to know the dark things you’re about to click on. Working late sans safeguards is possibly the number one gateway to viewing porn.

2. Don’t develop close relationships.  Avoid being asked vulnerable questions about your life, your heart and your doctrine. Nothing makes us more prone to sexual sin than a lack of intimate, Christ-centered relationships.

3. Learn how to cover your trail.  Delete your Internet history often and make sure you don’t download an accountability program to help protect your eyes.

4. Let your personal prayer time dry up. You might be tempted to confess if you have a powerful prayer encounter with God—so it’s best to skip this time and fully embrace your guilt and forget about grace for a while. Surely you don't deserve it.

5. Convince yourself it’s just a one-time event.  Compromise is the name of the game—if it’s just once, and you ask for forgiveness, is it really worth the humiliation and potential damage to your relationships and your leadership?

6. Minimize your sin.  If you think it’s small, your chances of sharing or confessing your sin will almost disappear. Of course, there’s no “small” sins—you learned that in seminary—but forget that for a short time until the guilt subsides. 

7. Become a legalist.  If you spend time looking at the sins of others—it’s likely that you won’t confess your own. In fact, legalism is a great path for those hiding secret sins.

8. Separate your spiritual life from your personal life.  If you can make a successful dichotomy between your "christian life" and personal life then you’re well on your way to hiding your sin and guilt. This will (almost) ensure that you don’t get nailed for your private sins in public (at least for a while).

9. Don’t develop an open dialogue with your spouse about your struggles.  If you intentionally close down any vulnerable and touchy conversations about your faults, sin and your deep struggles—you’re likely to keep the whole porn problem under wraps as your little secret (until it’s not so secret).

10. Forget about the power of the gospel.  If you go for long enough without remembering the life-altering power of the resurrection, your new life and the grace freely given to you—you can live in hiding like Adam and Eve, covering up your most vulnerable spots on your own (for a while) without getting God in the mix.

Of course, if you really want to protect yourself from the pitfalls of porn ... you can do the opposite and take this list as a challenge to cultivate strong safeguards to help keep your heart, life and ministry pure.

This post is written by Brian Orme.  You can find the original post here:  http://www.churchleaders.com/pastors/pastor-how-to/161864-10-easy-steps-to-look-at-porn-without-getting-caught.html?p=2

BE HOLY.
BE AMAN.

1 Comment
bjw
8/20/2012 00:57:03

Great advice, succinctly stated..

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